# Asking a girl to formal...



## abr71310 (Apr 8, 2009)

Formal = Prom, for those that don't know.
Yes, it seems dumb, but I'm stuck, and all of my friends are girlfriend-less nerds (none of which cube).

The girl I want to ask though cubes (she's not too fast, I'd say a few minutes, but she looks so cute solving it XD -- she uses two methods, one that's basically LBL and 6LLL, the other that's MUCH faster, like Keyhole + PLL --> OLL, but she claims both are "beginner methods" her friend taught her), but I mean, it's hard to try and ask someone out when they're two grades younger than you and the only place you know them from is a sports team... Especially when you've only really talked for maybe a few hours OUTSIDE of badminton...

Story behind the last sentence:
Basically we have had practices really early in the morning on Tuesdays, which, for our school at least, is a delayed start, classes start at 10:05am; Badminton practice goes from 7:00am to 8:30am, so there's a time lapse between end of practice and classes.

The way I met her was that I was walking back towards my car and I noticed that she was sitting sort of awkwardly alone (to get to my car I basically have to pass RIGHT by her, and she looks REALLY lonely), so I approached her and asked if she wanted company (I don't have ANY of my school stuff on me, plus I have to drive home and get my brother, get my school bag and stuff, and come back before 10 -- I live about 10 minute drive away), and she of course said "sure".

That basically went on for three or four weeks, we'd just talk about a lot of things, and I almost always had a cube on me... xD -- We went to badminton games and I always lent her a cube to play with on the bus on the way there, since there's nothing really to do until we got there...

She and I used to rally a lot after games, since neither of us had much to do, and after a home game a few weeks back we just basically sat in the gym (she was doing history, and I was basically LOVING my time explaining to her the Battle of the Atlantic) and talked until 5pm (our games ended around 3:30pm?? -- one school didn't show up for the tri-meet )

I think two or three weeks ago I gave her my white YUGA since the cubes she has are all crappy unlubed dollar store cubes, and I felt bad because I have like 15 cubes that are decent, so I stuffed one in her bag (conspicuously) and told her she could have it  (she told me on MSN a few nights later that the stickers were peeling, so I offered to resticker it, and she said she instead put animal stickers that she had from when she was a kid on them)

Usually I'm the first one to start talking on MSN since there's nothing really to start a topic about, so I always ask how she's doing and stuff like that...

What the heck do I do? Regionals for that sports team (BADMINTON!!!) was yesterday and Monday, but I'm a really bad conversation-starter, and I run out of things to say VERY quickly when I'm nervous.

I should have been playing, too, but I snapped my wrist beginning of last week and I'm basically out for a month (luckily the season's pretty much over now), but ARGH that's HORRIBLE.

Is there some magic formula that just makes one stop being nervous...?
Is there some magic conversation topic that can never deflate itself??

Have I been too much of an awkward person? HOW CAN ONE TELL??

I'm so confused... ><


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## Ikaruga102 (Apr 8, 2009)

Look. If it happens happens. Don't be nervous. You like her and if she likes you then great. If she doesn't just move on. It's not the end of the world. Not a big deal at all.


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## shelley (Apr 8, 2009)

abr71310 said:


> Is there some magic conversation topic that can never deflate itself??



If the length of your post is any indication, apparently there is.

Really, what's the worst that can happen?


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## Xekill (Apr 8, 2009)

do a "yes man" move


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## AvGalen (Apr 8, 2009)

> The way I met her was that I was walking back towards my car and I noticed that she was sitting sort of awkwardly alone (to get to my car I basically have to pass RIGHT by her, and she looks REALLY lonely), so I approached her and asked if she wanted company (I don't have ANY of my school stuff on me, plus I have to drive home and get my brother, get my school bag and stuff, and come back before 10 -- I live about 10 minute drive away), and she of course said "sure".


 
Next time you two talk, just ask her. If she says "sure" to a drive with a complete stranger, why would you assume she would say "no" now?

And just because you have an injury doesn't mean you can't show up for the training

Also: http://www.speedsolving.com/forum/showthread.php?p=160619#post160619


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## 04mucklowd (Apr 8, 2009)

you should ask to see her outside of badminton


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## abr71310 (Apr 8, 2009)

AvGalen said:


> > Also: http://www.speedsolving.com/forum/showthread.php?p=160619#post160619
> 
> 
> 
> ...


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## AvGalen (Apr 8, 2009)

AvGalen said:


> > Also: http://www.speedsolving.com/forum/showthread.php?p=160619#post160619
> 
> 
> 
> ...


So you know how to start a conversation with a girl you don't know.
Why do you think it is hard to ask her something now that you do know her?


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## Swordsman Kirby (Apr 8, 2009)

When she becomes really into speedcubing I'll show her this topic.

But really, just ask. At least you didn't get rejected BEFORE you asked. >_>


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## Dene (Apr 8, 2009)

Lol thread. Be a man, pick yourself up and do it. You'd have more balls than me if you did.


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## Jhong253 (Apr 8, 2009)

Just ask. If you are so bad at starting conversations, then just jump straight to the prom issue (Not that heck of an idea but better than not doing it at all).


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## ExoCorsair (Apr 8, 2009)

Swordsman Kirby said:


> When she becomes really into speedcubing I'll show her this topic.
> 
> But really, just ask. At least you didn't get rejected BEFORE you asked. >_>



Stole the words right out of my mouth.


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## StachuK1992 (Apr 8, 2009)

Dene said:


> Lol thread. Be a man, pick yourself up and do it. You'd have more balls than me if you did.



or if he didn't, you gender-confused (wo)man...


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## abr71310 (Apr 8, 2009)

Stachuk1992 said:


> Dene said:
> 
> 
> > Lol thread. Be a man, pick yourself up and do it. You'd have more balls than me if you did.
> ...



... WTH?



Swordsman Kirby said:


> When she becomes really into speedcubing I'll show her this topic.
> 
> But really, just ask. At least you didn't get rejected BEFORE you asked. >_>



Erm, did something happen that i don't know about?


*Random update:*
I asked her how Regionals went (remember that?) and with a cold "fine", she basically sent me on my way...
When i asked the badminton coach (also my neighbour) how she did ("fine" = bad, in my eyes, from her tone of voice), she got 4th! in our region...!!!

Did I ask something wrong or is she just genuinely not interested enough to talk??


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## StachuK1992 (Apr 8, 2009)

abr71310 said:


> Stachuk1992 said:
> 
> 
> > Dene said:
> ...


There's a rather large joke going around that Dene ....might just be Deney


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## Jhong253 (Apr 8, 2009)

Maybe she's competitive and is not happy with her place.


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## Dene (Apr 9, 2009)

abr71310 said:


> I asked her how Regionals went (remember that?) and with a cold "fine", she basically sent me on my way...
> When i asked the badminton coach (also my neighbour) how she did ("fine" = bad, in my eyes, from her tone of voice), she got 4th! in our region...!!!
> 
> Did I ask something wrong or is she just genuinely not interested enough to talk??



I strongly recommend finding her again and congratulating her and complimenting etc. etc. on how well she did.

Dr. Bear is here to help.


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## endless_akatsuki (Apr 9, 2009)

If you're too nervous to ask in person, give her something to ask her. It's a LOT easier to write something than to say something. You could do something like that other person and write Prom? or Formal? (or will you go to prom with me? which is a lot longer) on a rubik's cube (without messing with the centers) and have her solve it. And don't worry about being awkward. Just be genuine. As in, if she asks why you're acting weird, tell her it's because you have been wanting to ask her to prom. I mean, that's another way you could go. Or tell her you've been wanting to ask her something if that's easier. And she will make you tell her.


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## Dene (Apr 9, 2009)

Heh. For me, things I write end up being even more awkward than when I talk; you can only imagine how bad that must be.


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## Brian Le (Apr 9, 2009)

abr71310 said:


> AvGalen said:
> 
> 
> > > Also: http://www.speedsolving.com/forum/showthread.php?p=160619#post160619
> ...


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## EmersonHerrmann (Apr 9, 2009)

Heheheheheh, Brian's amazed that he inspired someone


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## abr71310 (Apr 9, 2009)

Dene said:


> abr71310 said:
> 
> 
> > I asked her how Regionals went (remember that?) and with a cold "fine", she basically sent me on my way...
> ...



I did, she got pissed because she was working on her essay.
When I was asking how THAT was going she got even madder...

I'm thinking she isn't getting enough sleep, but maybe I'm coming off too strong??



Brian Le said:


> abr71310 said:
> 
> 
> > AvGalen said:
> ...



Yes, you did.
It's not that I'm afraid of rejection, I'm afraid of my stability after the rejection...

I tend to be an off-the-handle type of person, especially since this happened twice before...


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## bundat (Apr 9, 2009)

It's obvious that it's a sensitive topic to her, so just let it go, and talk about something else. And maybe her essay was due soon or she felt it was horrible or something, so you just picked an annoying issue to her, one after another.

If you feel that you are in good terms (I suggest checking as she seemed pissed from your previous posts... don't ask her directly though, just go and say hi), then you could do it my way.

No frills, just ask her "Are you going to the prom?" and if she says yes, ask her if she has a date.

This gives her a hint that you're asking her, and lets her bail out by making up excuses if she doesn't want to go with you. Because girls don't like giving rejections either.

If she says no, she doesn't have a date, then just casually say "I'll pick you up at around 8 then?". Throw in a smile and a wink if it fits your style.

You can easily pass it off as if you were just kidding around if she says no, and if she doesn't, you're in.


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## AvGalen (Apr 9, 2009)

bundat said:


> It's obvious that it's a sensitive topic to her, so just let it go, and talk about something else. And maybe her essay was due soon or she felt it was horrible or something, so you just picked an annoying issue to her, one after another.
> 
> If you feel that you are in good terms (I suggest checking as she seemed pissed from your previous posts... don't ask her directly though, just go and say hi), then you could do it my way.
> 
> ...


Good advice. I am just guessing that bundat isn't a 13 year old boy


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## ThatGuy (Apr 9, 2009)

just ask her or you'll regret it. don't worry about her being two years younger, there are plenty of those kind of couples at our school


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## Swordsman Kirby (Apr 9, 2009)

abr71310 said:


> I'm afraid of my stability after the rejection...



Stability? Don't tell me you'll cry over it just because some girl said no to a dance.


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## ExoCorsair (Apr 9, 2009)

Swordsman Kirby said:


> abr71310 said:
> 
> 
> > I'm afraid of my stability after the rejection...
> ...



zomg again, stop that, Tim.


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## Jhong253 (Apr 9, 2009)

Come on bro, I'm going through the same thing with my school prom. I know how you feel and how nervous the whole shebang can be.

*BUT*, you will really regret it later if you don't ask her. Get over your whole stability issue, get over your feelings, just go with your feelings for her (if you have any left). Although I can't go to prom now, I felt much better about myself after actually asking. You will feel the same.


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## TurbulentTurtle (Apr 9, 2009)

Yeah man, just go for it and who knows, she will probably say yes.

I was in a situation not unlike yours a while back where there was a certain someone I was admiring from afar. For the longest time I couldn't even muster up the courage to talk to them, so you have already beaten me in that department. I am a pretty shy guy and I am not one to just spark up a conversation with anyone. anyway, I finally started talking to this person and it turns out they were into the same kinds of stuff I am, music, hobbies, games and all that junk. 
We saw each other outside school a lot more often, and finally prom was coming up and I saw all the girls getting excited and the boys were all anxious, and I felt the exact same way as the boys. I was nervous about asking this one person I have been getting closer with for months, but all my friends encouraged me and I finally did.
We had a great time together in the end, it was a lot of fun, and my date told me that he really liked me all along and was glad that I started talking to him.


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## Tyson (Apr 9, 2009)

TurbulentTurtle said:


> Yeah man, just go for it and who knows, she will probably say yes.
> 
> I was in a situation not unlike yours a while back where there was a certain someone I was admiring from afar. For the longest time I couldn't even muster up the courage to talk to them, so you have already beaten me in that department. I am a pretty shy guy and I am not one to just spark up a conversation with anyone. anyway, I finally started talking to this person and it turns out they were into the same kinds of stuff I am, music, hobbies, games and all that junk.
> We saw each other outside school a lot more often, and finally prom was coming up and I saw all the girls getting excited and the boys were all anxious, and I felt the exact same way as the boys. I was nervous about asking this one person I have been getting closer with for months, but all my friends encouraged me and I finally did.
> We had a great time together in the end, it was a lot of fun, and my date told me that he really liked me all along and was glad that I started talking to him.



Yeah go for it. Or you'll be old like me and regret you never asked that girl to dance when you were in 6th grade.


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## abr71310 (Apr 9, 2009)

Tyson said:


> Yeah go for it. Or you'll be old like me and regret you never asked that girl to dance when you were in 6th grade.



;; this isn't six grade, Tyson!! -- I'm pretty "frail" (wow, I'm pathetic) as it is....



Jhong253 said:


> Come on bro, I'm going through the same thing with my school prom. I know how you feel and how nervous the whole shebang can be.
> 
> *BUT*, you will really regret it later if you don't ask her. Get over your whole stability issue, get over your feelings, just go with your feelings for her (if you have any left). Although I can't go to prom now, I felt much better about myself after actually asking. You will feel the same.



I dunno, she seemed pretty pissed when I tried talking to her on MSN last night, she seemed really cranky and annoyed...

I remember back when we first talked we literally stayed up until like 3am every night we could and just talked about stuff on MSN...

She showed me her artwork a lot (after practice, on MSN, etc...) and I always said great things (dude, they were ALWAYS great, though... o_o) while she kept saying how bad they were... xD

we even made a parody of canadian english, hahaha...
It was basically that we add the letter that came last in the word in again, and add an "e"...

So tree became "treeee" LOLOLOL (we both thought it was hilarious, then we realized we needed more rules, so we said "no vowels, if the word already ends in a double consonant we would just add e, like "balle")...

LOL her name became so funny in our language, mine just became Michaelle.... ROFL.

How I miss those days... Badminton season is basically over... T_T;;



Swordsman Kirby said:


> Stability? Don't tell me you'll cry over it just because some girl said no to a dance.



Dude, I cried after I failed my chemistry test third period today.
I failed because out of the 5 problems, I completed one, and started (but got nowhere with) the other 4.

@bundat: She's in 10th grade, I'm in 12th. she's PROBABLY NOT GOING, since I'm probably one of like five grade 12 people that know who she is.


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## Rubixcubematt (Apr 9, 2009)

Ask her why she is annoyed. Maybe you did something (only a maybe) to annoy her, or maybe it is something else. If she does decide to spill it onto you, just try to be comforting and kind, which you already sound like you are. Then, once she has unloaded (If she does), then maybe you should ask her. dunno if this helps at all.....


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## James Kobel (Apr 9, 2009)

Maybe she's annoyed because she expected you to have asked her by now


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## Jhong253 (Apr 10, 2009)

Dude, if you are a senior and she's a sophomore, then you got much better chance of her saying yes. JUST DO IT. You will feel MUCH better if you ask (even if she says no).


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## JTW2007 (Apr 10, 2009)

abr71310 said:


> Is there some magic formula that just makes one stop being nervous...?



F R U' R' U' R U R' F' R U R' U' R' F R F' x2


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## keith_emerson (Apr 10, 2009)

If you're shy, follow this tip

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TQZGOfOfNio


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## AvGalen (Apr 10, 2009)

JTW2007 said:


> abr71310 said:
> 
> 
> > Is there some magic formula that just makes one stop being nervous...?
> ...


wrong alg, or at least not efficient. By now, everyone should know that all you need is the sexy move


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## JTW2007 (Apr 10, 2009)

Okay, fine. M2 U M2 U2 M2 U M2.


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## abr71310 (Apr 11, 2009)

Rubixcubematt said:


> Ask her why she is annoyed. Maybe you did something (only a maybe) to annoy her, or maybe it is something else. If she does decide to spill it onto you, just try to be comforting and kind, which you already sound like you are. Then, once she has unloaded (If she does), then maybe you should ask her. dunno if this helps at all.....



Currently on MSN... will update as things happen.



James Kobel said:


> Maybe she's annoyed because she expected you to have asked her by now



ROFL I wish..

I just remember that one time I sat beside her in the caf and was sort of loud when I was talking, and she got up and left without a word to me or anything...

Might have been that.



Jhong253 said:


> Dude, if you are a senior and she's a sophomore, then you got much better chance of her saying yes. JUST DO IT. You will feel MUCH better if you ask (even if she says no).



I dunno man, I doubt her being a sophomore gives me a better chance of her saying yes, it might just compel her to say no because "she's not old enough yet"...



keith_emerson said:


> If you're shy, follow this tip
> 
> http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TQZGOfOfNio



WTF...


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